I started this day last year at 2:00am by calling 911 when I realized that Brian was having a stroke. Every day since has been a struggle. Fighting for hope, pushing away fear, finding the patience to re-learn and the strength to keep showing up. This milestone feels big. We are grateful. The recovery Brian … Continue reading Forward
Today marks 6 months since we went to our annual Christmas party, came back to my dad's house to sleep and ended up in the ER with the trial of our lives. I was just reading some of my old posts about how I was sure that we were headed for greener pastures. How for … Continue reading Wednesday
When we were in pre-marital counseling (with our dear ones at betweentwotrees.org) it surfaced that I was not very sweet to Brian when he was sick. Apparently I acted sort of annoyed and put out rather than kind and concerned. So lovely of me. We were working through an exercise about "unwritten rules" in your … Continue reading Tenderness
9th Floor Christmas
It's the 24th of December and it's also day 24 of us being in the hospital. For those of you who don't know, my 42-year-old husband had a massive stroke the night of Dec 1st while we were on a weekend trip to CA. And almost a month later, we are still here. I spent Christmas … Continue reading 9th Floor Christmas
I can do hard things.
Today marks two years since Poppy got her cast off. As I looked back at photos this morning, it almost felt like watching someone else's life. I can't believe we did that. I have done plenty of hard things, but the "our baby is in a spica cast" season was particularly hard. Sleep deprived and … Continue reading I can do hard things.
Stepping Into the Gaps
Last week was my mom's birthday. She would have turned 71...I can't believe it. She went to heaven at 52 and she barely even had a gray hair. Although she did get her hair "frosted" so maybe it was in there somewhere. Nonetheless, she was young and beautiful and I hate that she's gone. I … Continue reading Stepping Into the Gaps
We are traveling back to Southern California soon for a visit and I keep catching myself saying, "when we're home we can..." But last week we put Arizona plates on our cars and we are daily running into people we "know" at the store. Today I am chasing down three packages that got accidentally sent to the … Continue reading Home
Stan Spiderman Day
Our hamster died last night. And while we didn't necessarily want a hamster (we got him in a white elephant gift exchange at a Christmas party) he was a sweet little part of our family. He came with all the fixins- a cage, food, bedding and a name. Stan. In honor of our beloved leader … Continue reading Stan Spiderman Day
Just over two years ago, we moved to the house on Courage Street. It seemed fitting- like a banner proclaiming the courage we had mustered in the hard years leading up to that move. Little did I know the courage it would take to move in here, welcome our third baby a month later, help … Continue reading Courage Street
Cover the Field
I finally have some time to carve out for writing but I find lately that I just don't have anything to say. Shocking, I know. There are too many heavy things going on in my life and in the world around me. Sometimes I hold back because I don't have anything nice to say. And … Continue reading Cover the Field